Divorce is a challenging experience for anyone. The end of a relationship can be emotionally and mentally draining, leaving you feeling raw and exposed. It’s natural to feel like you’ll never fully heal after divorce, but that’s not the case. With time and patience, you can mend your broken heart and start moving on with your life. Here are 15 signs that you’re healing after divorce.
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Why it’s critical you take steps to start healing
It is imperative to take steps to start healing after divorce as it is an emotionally difficult process. Divorce often brings up feelings of sadness, anger, and guilt that can linger for a long time if not addressed in a healthy way.
Taking positive steps towards healing, such as seeking professional help or finding support from advisors, can help an individual better understand their emotions and move forward in life.
It is also important to take time for yourself and focus on rebuilding your self-esteem. By giving yourself space to heal, you will be able to rediscover yourself and build resilience as you adjust to the changes brought on by divorce.
15 Signs You’re Healing After Divorce
You have heard me say a million times, “to thrive after divorce, you need to heal properly.” But, what does it even look like to heal fully after a divorce?
1. The mention of your ex no longer triggers you. The hairs on your neck don’t stand up, your body does not tense up, the tears don’t start to flow, and your blood does not boil.
2. You stop talking about your marriage, ex, and divorce all of the time. At first, your divorce was a hot topic between your friends and family. It is easy for you to get sucked into talking about it, whether you need to vent or feel the need to tell your side of the story, but now wanting to talk about the past is the last thing you want to do.
3. You no longer go over the “what ifs.” What if I had said this? What if I had done this differently? You have now accepted the divorce and know the “what ifs” won’t change anything.
4. You have stopped replaying the breakup. It no longer plays on a loop in your head. You don’t close your eyes, and you see their face and hear the breakup’s dialogue.
5. You get at least 8 hours of sleep and feel rested. You no longer cry to sleep, lie awake replaying the breakdown of the marriage, or plotting your revenge, and your ex is not the first thing you think about when you wake up.
6. You are indifferent about your ex. You have no good or bad feelings about them. You have no particular interest in them.
7. You can acknowledge the good times and bad times in your marriage. When you are grieving, you will want to rewrite the history of the relationship and only remember the bad times to explain the divorce and pain you feel, or you will only remember the good times to justify your sadness. It is important to remember the good and the bad.
8. You don’t believe future relationships will end the same way. You don’t set up a date or new relationship to fail just because your marriage ended.
9. You have hope for the future. The thought of making plans to reach your goals and create the life you dream of a reality excites you, and you are ready.
10. You no longer let memories control you. You don’t think back to a bad or good time and immediately get angry, or the tears start to flow. You can speak about them as if they are just part of your story and nothing more.
11. You know the role you played in the breakdown of your marriage. You have realized your mistakes and how you contributed to the divorce. You take ownership and are working on growing from this so that you don’t repeat the same mistakes in future relationships.
12. You have forgiven those you need to forgive. You realize that forgiving is not about condoning bad behavior but giving you peace.
13. You are exploring new interests/activities. You are trying things you have always wanted to try. Rediscovering the past interests you had forgotten about or were not allowed to do in the marriage.
14. You no longer “stalk” your ex; whether that is driving by his work or home, looking at his and his friends and family’s social media, or asking other people about him, you are no longer trying to find out information about him.
15. You consistently prioritize your well-being. You are always practicing the five steps to well-being and think about what is best for you.
Recap: You Can Thrive After Divorce
Divorce is one of the most difficult things you will ever go through, but it doesn’t have to define you. You can heal your broken heart and start moving on with your life with time and effort. Healing after divorce will come when you are more excited about the future than holding onto the past. If you’re feeling lost after divorce, don’t worry – I’ve got you covered – healing after divorce is a process.
Start with my FREE VIDEO TRAINING: “How to find laughter and lightness again after divorce without feeling rushed.” – ENROLL HERE!
